Teen Furjection
I waited my whole life to go to Furpocalypse! It was the only thing I thought about for months and months. I couldn’t even go to school I was so excited!
I worked so hard on my outfit and hand cut each strand of hair from my grandma’s old wig I found in the attic. They made the perfect whiskers! I struggled a little more with my tail, but managed to re-purpose a swimming noodle we had in the garage. I glued some material I found laying around in the basement, and even though it had a lot of pink in it, I thought it was good enough.
The day finally came and I checked in to the famous Furpocalypse as Slymie Shizzlesmore. I don’t usually tell people my full name but this was THE FURPOCALYPSE and I was sure I’d find the furlove of my life! I could barely keep it together.
I was just walking toward the Fursuit Game Room when, out of nowhere, the most handsome and exciting Komodo dragon appeared. He was everything I’d hoped he would be. Tall, limber, and dragon-like. His dragonness was 100% awesome! I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it before, but I LOVE dragons!
Anyway, I was being all fox-like, stroking my grandma-wig whiskers, when Komodo dragon guy introduced himself to me.
“I’m Kosmos,” he said wagging his big, burly tail and flashing his forked tongue. Oh. My. God. That forked tongue!
I told him I was Slymie and all, then made the stupid decision to swat at his tongue. I can’t believe I swatted at his tongue! He didn’t like it at all. Talk about the biggest mistake of my life.
I liked him so much and I just wanted him to like me back. So I did what any self-respecting fox would do. I just started screaming! It was the most beautiful, high-pitched scream you could imagine. I had been practicing it all week, just in case it came to that.
And you’ll never believe what happened next. He turned right around and flailed his tail at me, knocking me back into the furpopcorn stand. Can you believe that? I was so embarrassed! Then he just walked off and asked a squirrel to the Furparade. A squirrel! Ugh.
